The Tortured Poets Society

When Taylor Swift announced that she had been working on an album called The Tortured Poets Department, many people, myself included, accidentally referred to it as either The Tortured Poets Society or The Dead Poets Department for the first few weeks

As someone whose favourite movie is Dead Poets Society (1989), I shared my sister's hype for this new album. I hoped that a few of the songs would fit the vibe and story of this movie.

Overall, few songs fit the feeling I associate with DPS, but some did. And given the fact that Swift included two of the actors (Josh Charles (Knox Overstreet) and Ethan Hawke (Todd Anderson) ) from the 1989 movie in her music video for the track Fortnight, I believe the references I found are intentional. Swift is very specific about her easter eggs so this is no surprise.

But the one song that fit DPS, and more so the characters of Neil Perry (Robert Sean Leonard) was I Hate It Here. In this post, I'm going to talk about why I think this song, intentionally or not, fits Neil Perry so well. Spoilers for Dead Poets Society are therefore included. If you haven't watched the movie, go watch it and then return to this post so we can cry about this song together from the point of view of fans of this movie.

I'll break down the lyrics and how I view it as a long-time fan of DPS.

Quick, quick

Tell me something awful

Like you are a poet trapped inside the body of a finance guy

These lines at once made me think of the poets. They are to take on the roles of doctors, bankers, lawyers and 'finance guys' after they graduate from the prestigious Welton Academy. The characters talk about this early on in the movie, after Neil's father, Thomas Perry, has forced him to quit the school annual.

NEIL

 Oh, that's rich. Like you guys tell your parents off, Mr.

 Future Lawyer and Mr. Future Banker.

 CHARLIE

 Okay, so I don't like it any more than you do.

 NEIL

 Well, just don't tell me how to talk to my father. You

 guys are the same way.

As the movie continues, we see these characters, inspired by their new English teacher, John Keating (Robin Williams), start the Dead Poets Society, where they go off the school grounds to recite poetry and live freely. The 'poets', especially Neil, are shown to be trapped in the expectations their parents and the school put on them. 

We also have a scene between Mr Keating and Neil, when Mr Perry finds out his son has gone against his wishes, taking part in a production of Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream and wants Neil to quit it despite having the main part. 

NEIL

 No. What about the play? The show's

 tomorrow night.

 KEATING

 Well, you have to talk to him before

 tomorrow night.

 NEIL

 Isn't there an easier way?

KEATING

No.

 NEIL

 I'm trapped.

In this scene, we see how trapped Neil feels in his life. We see that he can't envision any way out of his situation. It makes his final decision less shocking later on. He's trapped inside the part he was born into; aka the role his father wishes for him to have.

Tell me all your secrets

This line could be about the Dead Poets Society, which is a secret from the world and only known by the poets and Mr Keating.

All you'll ever be is

My eternal consolation prize

These lines remind me of what Mr Perry says in his last conversation with Neil.

MR. PERRY

 Oh, stop it. Don't be so dramatic. You

 make it sound like a prison term. You

 don't understand, Neil. You have

 opportunities that I never even dreamt

 of and I am not going to let you waste

 them.

He wants to live vicariously through Neil. Neil mentions earlier that his family isn't as well off as Charlie's. So, in a way, Thomas Perry is making up for what he didn't have via Neil, pushing his dreams on him, making him his constellation price.

If comfort is a construct

I don't believe in good luck

Now that I know what's what

This can fit Neil's final desicion. He stops believing he will ever find a way to do what he loves, and by losing acting, he loses all that makes him feel alive. He 'understands' that he never will be in charge of his life.

I hate it here so I will go to

Secret gardens in my mind

People need a key to get to

The only one is mine

I view this as Neil's love of acting. He likes escaping into other characters and worlds, and they are ones his father will never reach them as he never tries to. The Secret Gardens - referencing the book by Frances Hodgson-Burnett - can also be about the Dead Poets Society and acting.

I read about it in a book when I was a precocious child

The book mentioned could either be the copy of Five Centuries of Verse that Mr Keating passes down to Neil or the books of Shakespeare that revive Neil's love for acting.

No mid-sized city hopes and small-town fears

I'm there most of the year

Cause I hate it here

I hate it here

Neil spends most of his free time thinking about poetry or acting as the movie goes on. Escaping through his mind to other worlds to be free of Welton and his father's expectations of him.

Everyone would look down

Cause it wasn't fun now

Seems like it was never even fun back then

Nostalgia is a mind's trick

Everything that brought the poets joy; the society, Mr Keating, Neil; is taken away from them after the play. All that was fun loses its spark and is the reason for their sorrow by the end. Although they look back at what Mr Keating taught them with love, the poets are probably going to struggle with thinking about the society without feeling mixed emotions too for a while after all that happened. 

If I'd been there, I'd hate it

It was freezing in the palace

Neil would've hated to see his friends and Mr Keating in pain. And the scene out in the snow where Todd breaks down after getting the news about his death would've broken him further. And the meetings themselves were held in a cold cave, where they barely got a fire going, but they still found solace in it.

I hate it here so I will go to

Lunar valleys in my mind

When they found a better planet

Another reference to Neil escaping reality through poetry, Keating's lessons and acting.

Only the gentle survived

I dreamed about it in the dark

The night I felt like I might die

These lines remind me of A Midsummer Night's Dream, the play Neil is in on the final night of his life. Especially when it comes to the mention of 'only the gentle' which reminds me of the line in Puck's (and Neil's) final speech in the play.

'Gentles do not reprehend. If you pardon, we will mend.'

I have always believed that this speech is Neil's way of talking to his father, begging him to make amends. He is the gentle of the story, representing the part he wishes Neil to play in real life. In the end, the gentle, the people who are more like Mr Perry, are the ones that survive in this world of Welton Academy.

No mid-sized city hopes and small-town fears

I'm there most of the year

Cause I hate it here

I hate it here

Neil dreams of the big city, where he can pursue acting without having the fear installed in him by the town and people around him. He dreams of something bigger far away from where he was brought up.

I'm lonely but I'm good

I'm bitter but I swear I'm fine

I'll save all my romanticism for my inner life and I'll get lost on purpose

In the end, Neil feels alone in the world. The idea of living the rest of his life without the poets or acting is too much to bear. He decides to live inside his head one final time as he puts on Puck's crown before leaving the world and getting lost in it forever.

This place made me feel worthless

Lucid dreams like electricity, the current flies through me,

And in my fantasies, I rise above it

And way up there, I actually love it

I see this as Neil's stance on his family and Welton and how they made him see no other way out. He imagines freeing himself from reality as he did up on the stage. He was happy up there. It's like electricity waking him up for the first time as he acts and listens to people applaud him, seeing him for who he is. But Welton and his father didn't want him to have that, and so he felt life and himself were worthless and decided to end both.

This song can easily be relatable to any creative person, but I will forever listen to it and think of Neil Perry. Whether Taylor had him in mind when writing the song, I can't say for sure, but the few references there are, are intentional. 

Idun Alcea, 23 April 2024